Sunday, August 30, 2009

First Blow/Failure

So hoping writing on this will help me feel better. I guess my first workout didn't go as good as planned. The line up was:

2 miles warm-up
2x50 butt kicks
2x50 skips
stretch
4x1 mile- 90% HR(with drink and 400 jog recovery)
1x10 min. stairs alternating (1-step and 2-step)
5 mile cool-down
stretch

Going into the workout I didn't know what the miles were suppose to be exactly.

Well here is what transpired-

2.2 mile warm-up (don't ask)
2x50 butt kicks
2x50 skips
stretch
4x1mile (5:55, 6:03, 6:06, 6:03)(400j recovery/drink)
1x10min stairs (alternating)
5.3 mile cool-down(don't ask)
stretch

Later I found out the miles were suppose to be in around 5:45-5:50. So I have an extremely long way to go to get where I need to be.

I am so let down. I have disappointed another coach. This seems to be the story of my life. And this was on the first workout with her. If she was smart she would pull out NOW after finding out I'm not as good of a runner as she thought. I feel like a disappointment, a letdown, a failure you name it and I feel like it.

She is amazing for taking me on and trying to get me to be my best but we have a long way to go apparently and not much time (2 months including the taper so really less then that). I am not sure this is going to happen. Either she is going to drop me(like she has every right to) or I am just not good enough to be as good as she thought......

Got a workout today built in to my long run, first time I have ever done anything like this. Let's hope it goes A LOT A LOT A LOT A LOT better. I need it mentally. I am losing my confidence and doubting myself.

PS- Thanks for all the people that are trying to help my dream come true by getting me to Spain. To compete with the best in the World. You are 1 in 100 million. Truly a special person. May you have all the best.

2 comments:

  1. I am brand new to your blog (thanks for stopping by mine for the giveaway) but don't be so hard on yourself, girl! You are amazing!

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  2. Thanks!!!! Hope your week is going well!

    ReplyDelete